Tales From the Hilltop
An intelligent, yet Devil's Advocate view of the world

Episode Thirty-Seven: A Sexually Sexy Truth…

Here’s something we all know: It’s all around us these days.  No matter how hard you try to escape it, censor it, shield it, the topic of sex coming up in today’s society is as rampant as the air we breathe or the food we eat.

And here are two things that you may or may not know: it always been there, and it’s NEVER going to go away.

Today’s episode has made me ponder on something that for whatever reason still seems to be a very taboo subject here in America. I question all of it because in this day and age, for one reason or another, people still either are too naïve or simply believe sex should be shut out in the air of America, no matter what else is going on in the world around them.

OK, we all got our reasons why this is very dangerous thinking. The first one being religious-based, with the belief is that a sexually crazed nation will ultimately lead to a doomed nation. No matter how you spin it, God (or the Gods, depending on who you pray to, if anyone) frowns upon promiscuity and relations either before or outside of marriage. While I don’t doubt what the books say, I DO doubt that religion will be expected to trump human desire every day. That’s not to make up some lame excuse as “people makes mistakes”, but that IS to say “we’re only human”. After a certain age, there will come a need to interact with other humans in that manner, and most of us fail fighting it at one point in time or another. It’s called puberty. I don’t think that makes us bad people, deviants, or ungodly, but folks decide apparently that in life, some of these things are worth facing wrath later to experience and enjoy sex now.  Especially since some of these interactions can have a part in leading to – and sustaining – a happy marriage.

This leads me to take the case of one Brandon Davies, a now-former member of the BYU men’s basketball team. BYU – Bingham Young University – has suspended him off the team for violating part of their “honor code” in which students that attend the school must abide by. The rule he broke? Celibacy. As BYU is populated by people of the Mormon belief, they have implemented into their code of conduct that no sex shall be permitted to take place on the campus. Unfortunately, Mr. Davies and his girlfriend were found to have broken that when allegedly she became pregnant, and he was suspended off the team for the rest of the school year. Who is wrong here? If anything, this is the fault of Mr. Davies. If he knew that was one of the rules going to the school, then why sign that contract, knowing he might one day succumb to his urges and break them. That being said, I’d be wrong if I said BYU really needs to take a look at its social circle if they believe their entire campus is 100% celibate.

The second reason sex seems to be too taboo in America is that it sends a bad message to our children. This is where the practical side in me has to come to play. Turn on the TV; more than likely, you’ll see a program or commercial that has some sort of innuendo of sexual relation. Listen to the radio, there’s sexual lyrics being sung, rapped, and yodeled all day everyday in the urban setting, except, of course, for the 9-1 Sunday morning Gospel music block. Read the news; more and more, stories are breaking out that not only adults are getting hit with cases of sex with minors what seemed like on a regular basis, the kids themselves are “getting it on”, in the schools, no less. The point? Most of these kids ALREADY know what’s going on in terms of sex. Schools are now giving out condoms loud in Sex Education classes. In this new age where that kind of info can be accessed instantly, the more that adults or the powers that be attempt to hide it, the more curious the youth get to seek it out.

Now, does this mean that we should give up, and start putting on “Debbie Does D.C.” at 12:30 PM on the Disney Channel? Absolutely not. There are still standards and morals that society has to maintain on both ends of the spectrum. But, where is the middle ground for this? I’m sure everyone will agree that kids under the age of 13 shouldn’t be exposed to this type of stuff, but why is America still so disillusioned to believe that at the ages of 14 and 15, young teens aren’t aware of the sexual nature they’ve inherited, and that they should be totally ignorant to it until they hit 16, 17, or even 18 years old? Am I saying to start letting 14 and 15-year-olds have sex like it was the 70s? No way. Irresponsible behavior like that is what has teen pregnancies, abortions, and STDs all all-time highs in this country, not to mention the rise in pedophilic activity. What I am saying is ignorance to this subject does just as much harm as well, normally resulting in sexual mutinies of sorts once the sheltered one’s eyes are “revealed” . In one of my earliest episodes, I used an example of young teens that are sheltered their whole lives, who get “turned out” once they start to experience the world on their own for the first time in college when they finally leave home. It happens more often than we would.

What really bugs me out as to why America is so morally outraged against sex these days, is the outright hypocrisy that’s popping up with it. What’s seemingly like a record number of politicians, who are supposed to be the leaders of this country, are more and more getting caught in sexual scandals of either infidelity with their spouses, engaging in wild sexual behaviors, fathering children out of wedlock, or some other deed. Even in the churches, where sexual restraint is pretty much demanded, there aren’t immunities to human nature and also deception happens in this department. My whole argument with all of this is: you can’t try to tell one young person how to live if you’re secretly living the other way (or even lived that way and now reformed yourself)? No, I’m not condoning the philosophy of “they messed up, so I can mess up to”. What I am saying is that people need to realize that this topic is out there so much, that while it’s morally crazy to let kids have free reign to explore it, it’s equally insane to totally deny it exists. Not when every music video has half-naked women in it. Not when pornography sells billions of dollars of merchandise and videos every year. Not when former presidents of the country are being investigated – and admitting to –  accusations of cheating on their wives in some form.

In conclusion, I don’t knock how parents raise their kids at home. You all think sex is shown too much on TV? Turn it off. Put the blocks on certain channel; that’s why products have them now. Regulate the music they listen to, and the friends they hang out with. Just beware: eventually, the day will come when they find out, one way or another. I just hope they’re ready to deal with it, or they may some serious mistakes from not knowing about it. Sex is essential to survival, so the day that comes where people won’t need it to reproduce or for pleasure, that will be the day America can be super prude and back to 1950s mentality on the subject.  Since that day won’t be coming anytime soon, the naïveté needs to be curtailed.

3/3/2011

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